March 13, 2009

Flashback Friday: Turning Eight

As some of you may or may not know, I used to be LDS, or Mormon, as it is commonly known. At the age of eight, you get baptized into the church. This is a very "big" deal, and you meet with the bishop of your ward, it's a long and rewarding process.*

Well, on November 2nd, I was baptized.

Even though I was eight years old at the time, I was very emotional. (I know, I thought I would outgrow that one too.) I was also baptized with another boy, but he was a little bit older than I was (10 I think), and he was baptized after I was. I was very, very emotional, and I was bawling from the time I sat down. I could not stop crying, and, frankly, no one tried to stop me.

Then, my bawling turned into sobbing. As I was walked into the baptismal fount, that was it. I had been looking forward to this day, but I was crying. As my dad said the words that would make me a member of the church, I was bawling, still. He dunked me into the water (all of the way, that's how we get baptized), and only my rotten luck could make my foot pop up. So, I got to do that whole thing over. I cried even harder.

After that, I was walked into the Women's bathroom, and I changed onto a big, white dress. I was still an emotional mess, and that lasted throughout the night.

Since all of our family traveled to see my baptism, I was given the Gift of the Holy Spirit as well. I had to keep myself together for that as well, and I did. I cried a little towards the end, but that was fine.

The whole day was full of tears, most of them happy tears. I was ecstatic to finally be a member of the church. As some of you may or may not know, my mother and father made the choice to leave the church, which meant that my sister and I were also leaving the church.

That experience has been a sad one, filled with questioning and doubt, and I would rather not talk about it, on the internet, for all to see.

Your Over-Emotional Blogger,

*: This is very complicated to explain. For more information, you can click here.

1 comment:

McGlone Bunch said...

It sounds like you are really struggling??? I feel bad.